Inversion Part 3

This extended period of time without any sun can cause Solar Disorders.

Lackasunanomia: After a period of time without sun exposure- you begin to run down- like a tape recorder with low batteries. The smiles are harder to develop, you stop laughing, you stop looking up- giving up hope that there's anything there and you soon progress to the next stage.

Forgetasunanomia: This is the stage where you start believing that the Grey, dark skies is how it always is. You think dragging yourself around is normal. You forget the warmth that lies just beyond the clouds and you become a fog dweller and now you're dangerously close to the third stage.

Apathasunanomia: Now, not only do you not remember the sun- you don't care anymore. You are angry and miserable and you like it!

Inversion Part 2

In Salt Lake, however, we do have a phenomena that does like to stick around for extended periods of time. It's called the "Inversion". Inversion is where a high pressure situation develops amd although it is warm and beautiful within the high pressure area, it can trap the cold air in low lying places, causing smoke, fog, and exhaust to get trapped in a thick sun-blocking layer that can stay cold, dark and unhealthy for weeks on end- maybe even months!

Inversion Part 1

There is a saying in Utah, "if you don't like the weather, just wait five minutes." That's because weather here can change so quickly. Bright sunny days can be assaulted any afternoon by violent thunderstorms and the coldest, foggiest days can quickly be warmed by a warm southern wind, only to snow again when the cold front- against which the southern winds were blowing, hits form the North. Suffice to say, whatever it is, change can quickly come.

FEAR- Rerun

The Fear That Lies Beneath the Bed

I know everyone has experienced it, some time or another. The irrational fear of going into the basement, entering a dark room, or walking through a grove of trees at night- especially at this time of the year when all the leaves are gone and there are just sticks and spooky shadows. For whatever reason, we just know something is watching us, stalking us, and at any moment- when we least expect it- is ready to grab us from behind and drag us away.

Generations of kids- and sometimes not so kids- have lived in fear of what lies beneath the bed. They are in terror of leaving a foot too close, too long next to the edge of the bed. I admit it, I have always been afraid of that brief moment after my foot hits the floor and I start to stand up. "Is there anything under the bed?" Just to be on the safe side, I always offer a quick prayer as I put space between myself and the edge of the bed.

It happened on one of those nights when everyone is asleep and you're there still wide awake...feeling thirsty. I wanted to get a drink of water, but that would mean I would have to get out of bed...and it's dark. I was a prisoner of my own irrational fear.

No!!! Enough is enough! I decided to prove to myself (and to all of humanity) that this fear of something being under the bed is completely unfounded! It'’s not like I had never seen beneath the bed before. All previous inspections had turned up not one demon, not one monster, not even one bad guy! I would symbolically, and actually, put my foot down once and for all and not be afraid. I was not going to pray for protection either! I was going to be the grown man that I was and just do it!"

I flung my covers off with authority and in a mighty gesture I took my small step for man- giant leap for mankind and planted my foot squarely on the floor. My other foot majestically took the spot right next to the first as my body swung around to an upright sitting position. I sat there for a moment as if I was King of a newly conquered world. And then it happened.

In a wink of an eye, my foot was grabbed from the dark underbelly of the bed. I gasped for air, felt my blood run cold and I could feel my whole body swell with fear. After all those years of waiting for me to blink, to let down my guard, something had grabbed me, caught me- like a fly in a spider's web! My own arrogance had lead me to this demise. "Do I dare look?"”, I thought. Of course, I have to look!

I looked down at my feet and there, with a firm grip was my worst fear. An arm, a skeleton arm, partially clad in a dark robe sleeve protruding out from under the bed, it's bony fingers securely wrapped around my ankle. I was stunned, injected by the venom of fear. I couldn't think. I couldn't scream for help. I had already screwed myself on the praying thing. I began to accept my doom.

I felt the grip of the hand tighten as it started to pull back as if to pull me under the bed. I didn't move. The arm pulled again, this time a bit more forceful and with a jerk. I still didn't move. A light turned on in my head! It had waited too long! What started out as a scrawny 6-year-old boy was now a "too-much-for-skeleton-demon" 240-pound man- definitely not to be dominated by bone and robe!

I kicked my leg up as hard as I could and could barely contain my smile when I heard his bony head clunk against the bed rails. I laughed as I did it several more times. This was fun now! I felt his grip loosen, so I quickly reached down and grabbed the arm that had held me bound and yanked that so-called demon out from under the bed. And then I saw what I believe no one else has ever seen before...I saw fear in the face of fear!

I laughed in its face- "HA!" and let it go. It and his black robe began disappearing...Nay! Running...Nay! Fleeing into the darkness.

What exactly was I supposed to glean from this moment? I am not entirely sure, but I know I learned a couple of things, four things actually.

First: Sometimes, as in the case of my skeleton friend, you can wait too long for some things.

Second: Sometimes, as in my case, good thing do come to those who wait.

Third: Size does matter.

And Fourth and the probably the ultimate lesson: THERE WAS SOMETHING UNDER THE BED!!!!!!!

Twain Science

Therefore, the Mississippi between Cairo and New Orleans was twelve hundred an fifteen miles long one hundred and sevety-six years ago. It was eleven hundred and eighty after the cut-off of 1722. It was one thousand and forty after the American Bend cut-off. It has lost sixty-seven miles since. Consequently is length is only nine hundred and seventy-three miles at present.

Now, if I wanted to be one of those ponderous scientific people, and “let on” to prove what had occurred in the remote past by what had occurred in a given time in the recent past, or what will occur in the far future by what has occurred in the late years, what an opportunity is here! Geology never had such a chance, nor such exact data to argue from! Nor “development of species” either! Glacial epochs are great things, but they are vague—vague—vague. Please observe:--

In the space of one hundred and seventy-six years the Lower Mississippi has shortened itself two hundred and forty-two miles. That is an average of a trifle over one mile and a third per year, Therefore, any calm person, who is not blind or idiotic, can see that in the Old Oölitic Silurian Period, just a million years ago next November, the Lower Mississippi River was upwards of one million three hundred thousand miles long, and stuck out over the Gulf of Mexico like a fishing rod. And by the same token any person can see that seven hundred and forty-two years form now the Lower Mississippi will be only a mile and three quarters long, and Cairo and New Orleans will have joined their streets together, and be plodding comfortably along under a single mayor and a mutual board of alderman. There is something fascinating about science. One gets such a wholesome return of conjecture out of such a trifling investment of time.

Mark Twain, from "Life on the Mississippi".

John Henry Part 3

At the sound of the day’s whistle, the outcome was already known but the length of measure confirmed it. John Henry had drilled 14’ to the steam drill’s 9. Man had apparently won. The crowd cheered and the celebration began. Then all of sudden, not five minutes from winning, John Henry dropped dead.

Some say it was exhaustion. Others say it was the blood vessels done burst in his brain. Yet others say God took him because after that display, there was nothing left for a man to prove in this life! Whatever the case, the mighty John Henry was dead.

The salesman, being a quick thinking type, immediately pointed out that his machine was still ready to go. “Man may have won today, but I’ll win tomorrow!” he claimed. Everyone knew there was no other to challenge the steam drill the next day.

John Henry was quickly buried along the hundred others in a shallow, sandy grave outside the would-be tunnel. Some thought never to be spoke of again; forgotten like all the others.

Tragedy? Maybe. John won the contest only to loose his life and the steam drill eventually displaced all the other hammersmons. Bu many a hero and legend are not recognized until they move on from us. John Henry was about the individual. He possessed the raw strength that no system could take away form him.

How would you respond? When faced with a challenge, John Henry did not shrink away. When tackling a challenge, John Henry gave it his all. In this day when we, as individuals, are constantly being challenged by faster machines, corporate price saving policies and plans, how will you make your stand? How much are you willing to put on the line and also say “I am here and will not be easily dismissed.”

John Henry did not go quietly into the night, John Henry instead said, “You cannot defeat me, you may outlive me, but you won’t ever defeat me.” And they didn’t and that’s the stuff from which legends are made!

John Henry as told by "Billie Harold Jones" as told by Mike Jensen Part 2

John Henry had been born a slave and had been freed following the War. Although the work was ever as hard as it had been on the planation, John Henry now worked for himself; he worked as a free man. At 6 feet tall and 200 pounds, John Henry was a mountain of a man. His size, his determination and his swinging of his 14 pound hammer allowed him to drill 10-12 feet per day; a depth not matched by any other man!

One day a salesman came to the camp. “The day of the hammersmon is over!” He proclaimed. Leaning against his contraption he continued, “This here steam powered drill can out-drill any man, any day.” The crew foreman was interested. The crew was amazed... all except John Henry.

John Henry walked up to the machine, looked it over real good, looked at the salesman (who was now looking very small and very nervous), looked back at the machine and then with a smile beaming brighter by the second, he turned to the crew and said in that deep smooth voice, “Unless dat man 's me!” The crowd exploded in cheers.

“You might be a mighty man, but this here machine is the future. Men, like yourself, are well the past.” The salesman retorted, momentarily recapturing the attention of the crowd and immediately drawing all eyes to see what John Henry would have to say.

“Well, I seen da past an’ I donts know much about da future, but I do’s know bout the now. How ‘bout seeing for real just who’s the best, that machine of yours or me.”

“A contest?” asked the salesman.

“Yessir” responded John Henry as he continued to smile out to the approving crowd.

The salesman was also smiling at this point and exclaimed, “Gentleman we’ve got ourselves a contest!” And the crowd went wild.

The contest was set for the next day. Man vs. machine. After twelve hours, who could drill the deepest?

The next morning, John selected a 20 pound hammer and the best “shaker” he knew and at the sound of the whistle both he and the steam drill, operated by a foreman, went to work.

With both the steam drill and the sound of the twenty pound hammer going full speed, the mountain itself seemed to shutter. Like claps of thunder rolling up and down the Greenbrier River canyon, the sound of drilling filled the entire countryside.

Folks say that John Henry had never worked so hard. He was a man determined to show his stuff. On his shoulders rested the fate of the hammersmons, in his arms swung the hammer of hard work, and at the end of the hammer he drove the drill of determination: a determination to make his mark, a determination to say, “I am here!”

John Henry as told by "Billie Harold Jones" as told by Mike Jensen Part 1

On May 10, 1869 the Golden Spike was driven, completing the Transcontinental Railroad and joining once and for all the East to the West.

About the same time, there were other railroads being built. The war between the states had just concluded and President Lincoln had called for a healing. This healing would include the rejoining of the North and the South and again it was to be done by the railroads.

Somewheres around 1870, the Chesapeake and Ohio railroad was cutting a path through West Virginia and they were moving along quite fine, quite fine that was until they ran into the Big Bend Mountain. Big Bend Mountain was a mile and a quarter thick and it sat right in the middle of Green Brier River. Even the river had enough sense to go around and not try to cut through it. The men that ran the railroad were not like other men. They just set their mind to it and they just did it. To around the mountain would be an extra 7 miles of track, so they decided to go through it.

Saying you're going to go through a mountain and going through the mountain are two different things. The C&O railroad would soon find out that lesson as they would spend the next three years and 1000 men to build that tunnel. Hundreds of those thousand men died in the process as well. It was the making of a true tragedy, and it was, but it is also the thing Legends are born from. In in this case, that Legend is John Henry.

John Henry was a hammersmon. He drove steel spikes, called drills, in the rock by means of a hammer. A hammersmon had work with him another man called a "shaker". The shaker would shake and twist the drill following each hammer strike. This shake and twist kicked out the excess dust and kept the drill from wedging itself into the rock. The two would work the drill until they had drilled a hole deep enough to load with explosives and blasted out.

John Henry was, by the way, the best hammersmon around!

When Small Things Become Large

Siberious Tigerous (or something like it) is the Latin or scientific name for a Siberian Tiger. They are fierce animals with great hunting skills. Big, very powerful, and not to be underestimated.

Feline domesticus is the Latin name for the house cat. Supposedly, they are exact miniatures of their Siberian cousins. They have the same brute force but only weight 6-12 pounds as opposed to a couple thousand, or what ever it is a Tiger weighs. It's a cute thought but beyond the "that's nice", I've never gave it much thought.

Some time ago we found that we had attracted and "caught" a stray cat in our storage-filled basement. It took us a couple of weeks to figure it out. Our cat, although portly, could not be eating as much food as he appeared to be eating. Finally one night with a flashlight, the extra cat was spotted for a nanosecond as it ducked behind a stack of storage boxes- still packed from when we last moved...8 1/2 years ago.

The hunt was on. I methodically moved boxes, eliminating the hiding spots. Section by section, I was cornering my prey. After many boxes, bags of clothes, and defunct appliances- I had the target in site. It was a nothing cat- the only fat on it's body obviously coming form the number of meals he had stolen from the cat dish during its short stay at our place.

I got down on my belly and scooted over to the storage rack and then with my own "quick as a cat" reflexes- I snagged that kitty and pulled it out from under the shelf.

It was at this point that the feline domesticus transformed into the siberious tigerous that lurked within. It lit into me like it had planned it all along and I was the dumb prey that had wandered into the hunters trap. Fangs, fur and claws are all I saw. It chew up one hand and down the other arm like it was eating corn on the cob.

One of my boys later recounted that he knew I was in trouble and it must of really hurt due to all the bad words I was using and the volume at which I was using them.

As I lay defeated (and crying) my wife was able to get a door open and direct the cat, who was doing it victory march, up and out of the basement. I am sure he is somewhere telling his friends all about the big fat guy he tore up after crashing his crib.

Me? I ended up going to the late night clinic, receiving antibiotics and other such medications through the end of a needle. I would have to later get a number of rabies shots as well- seeing how I could not produce the cat for examination. I'm not sure what hurt more- the bites and shots or having to admit I was in the ER because of some little kitty.

To this day, I wear the scars of my encounter, I will not go down into the basement alone, and I talk to my cat nicely- calling him "Sir".

Head Over Heels (Part 2)

(Continued from yesterday)

As the running back lumbered toward me and as I was fulfilling my obligation to close the gap between us by moving toward him, all the coaching and months of drills and practice were echoing over and over in my head. “Bend your knees. Get low. Power into the tackle”. Of course there was also the other voice in my head screaming, “Look at the size of that thing! Run Away!!!”
As the two of us were about to meet “officially”, I had a quick, but strong, shot of confidence and almost started saying, “I think I can. I think I…” and then POW!! Hope, confidence and all the hours of training could not compensate for the extra 95 pounds of running back.
Like a B.B. hitting a freight train, I went straight backwards and quickly noticed how I was seeing clouds instead of grass. At one point, my feet swooshed by as if running through the clouds. I was airborne, spinning head over heels, and slightly dazed.
Now nothing makes a big…sorry, huge running back happier then to run over the top of a vanquished opponent. This running back was to make no exception. And as I hit the ground and found myself on my back, I noticed the big boy again entering my space, this time exactly over me.
If one is upright and one extends one’s legs, there will be a penalty flag. It’s called tripping. If one is flat on their back and extends one’s legs straight up, it’s called a tackle. I stuck my legs straight up in the air and made the tackle. I agree, the style was not anything for the highlight reel, but it worked then and the two or three other times the two of us met later in the game.
My old football coach, Coach Hatch taught that it was the small things that mattered. But when you’re dealing with a big thing, a huge thing, bigger then you might be able to handle, I am sure Coach Hatch would advise, “Just do what you can”.
All dignity aside, of course.

Head Over Heels (part 1)

I was a whopping 145 pounds at the conclusion of my High School Junior year football season. Weight training was now to begin for the upcoming season and goals needed to be set. I figured I would need to be at least 160 pounds by the start of the next season to secure a starting position. I began to eat.

I ate everything that moved, and anything that didn’t. I took on a job at Hardee’s not only to earn money to afford double lunches at school, but also to clean up on extra food at work! For months, I ate and lifted weights. I would do anything if it had the promise of raising my weight to my goal.

Opening night, I had done everything I could and I tipped the scales at 150 pounds. I had only gained 5 pounds! My ambition had earned me the starting spot of defensive back on the varsity team, the 5 extra pounds would have to do.

Everything went fine for the first two games and then we played Granger High School. Granger high school ran a tough running game anchored by a huge 245 pound running back. 245 pounds! He outweighed me by almost 100 pounds! I was a defensive back, but with their style of running attack, there was a very good chance he and I would meet.

Meet we did. About half way through the first quarter, the big…no HUGE running back cleared the end of the line and started making his way into my territory. It was the two of us, one on one.

(continued tomorrow).